final steps...

i dunno why i keep posting bout this, but somehow at this stage, it just seems necessary... you know, like it's "the thing to do"...

anyway, i'm talking bout me being in my final semester, sitting for my "final" final exams...

right at this moment, it's two down and one to go... =)

so it's just one more paper, one more presentation and one more thesis - all to be completed by the 30th of April which gives me about 3 weeks... after that, i'm done!

and you know what? at this very moment, as i'm typing away at my computer, i dun really want to be done. i don't. why?

that's a good question and i dun really have the answer. i guess the closest i could think of is - i'm afraid. truly frightened. afraid of the fact i'm leaving the security of being a student... afraid of taking up my first full time job... afraid of facing the harsh world out there... afraid of acknowledging the realities of life...

i've always not dealt with uncertainties well... just dun have the confidence or the courage to do so... every time i have a situation to face, i will have all the possibilities figured out... although i can't cover all possibilities to every event in my life, but i've done pretty much alright... you won't believe the kind of things that i imagine in my head all the time... and i'll always have the solution to every possibility... well, almost every possibility... there is always a chance where something comes and hits you from behind and just knocks you unconscious...

anyway, what i'm trying to say, i guess, is that i don't know wat to expect after this three weeks. i know my life will change. but i don't know how and i can't even tell the magnitude of the change. and this is bothering me. i guess 17 years in the education system has made me comfortable. and i dun want to leave this comfort zone. not now. not yet.

if only...

if only
you strummed the strings of my heart
if only
you sang to the tune of my soul
if only
you danced to the rhythm of my life
if only
you held to the silence of my thoughts
if only...

ps: if only i could continue writing this article, it might turn out pretty good... but i ran out of "if only"... =)

will i miss this?

well, i'm talking about the feelings running through me right now as i prepare for my final "final exams"... the normal feelings are there... you know... anxiety, nervousness, freaking out, not knowing what to expect, feeling tired although i've had more than enough sleep... oh yeah, and the feeling that anything is more interesting than my books right now... but, there are some new feelings added this time around...

relief? joy? excitement? sad? not wanting to move on...

i mean... this is it you know? after 17 years in the education system, i'm finally graduating! i'm moving on to a new phase in my life... you know what i mean?

(jason and kam - i know you two have moved past this... but, can you remember how you felt when it was your final "finals"?)

anyway, uniten has been good to me... had a few great frens, more than a few great lecturers...

anyway, i've just got another 5 days to my first paper... it's on a saturday... imagine that! so back to my books for the last time? i really can't describe the feeling going through me right now...

amazing race asia?

hi...

just wondering, would anyone be interested in taking part in the next edition of the amazing race asia with me?

hahaha... this is actually a question for kam and/ or jason in particular... or even jacky, ang, zihui... but these guys never do read my blog... so...

kam/ jason... interested?

i'm interested in the 100k cash prize and also because i'll be free for about 3 months once i graduate... =)

wrong attraction?

it feels weird when my leg is getting more attention than me. everytime i walk past ppl these past couple of days, they would just turn back to look at my leg. feels really weird. well, actually i know why they do that. but it's still weird.

the reason? last thurs i played futsal with jacky and friends... at one point, i jumped to avoid a tackle and i landed awkwardly on my left leg. with that, my ankle was twisted pretty bad. to make things worse, i skinned my knee around the size of a 50 cent coin (slightly larger actually) and it's pretty deep too.

at first, i thought it was just a twisted ankle although the chinese physician that i went to suggested that i probably fractured my ankle. well, i dun think it's that bad - the pain has subsided (it's already been a week!) but the thing is right now, my foot is still swollen and it still hurts around my ankle. it feels like my whole leg is bruised especially at the joints, it feels like my foot is blue-black (i dunno how to describe this)...

ok... back to the story of ppl staring at my foot... it's probably just because i have been limping around uniten for the past week... hahaha...

ps: you know the sad part of the story? i just bought a new pair of shoes and that was the first time i wore that pair for futsal... talk about lousy luck... =(

beginning of the end...

i'm updating my blog from uniten's library. this could most probably be the last time i will do so. and honestly, i can't remember when was the previous time i actually did this... was it in my first year? or second year? it all seems so long ago.

right now, i'm in the middle of the traditionally hectic time of the semester. with about 3 weeks to go to my finals... and about 7 weeks to hand in my thesis (signalling the end of my career as an undergraduate), things can't get more cramped than this...

next week, i'll have 2 tests, a project to hand in and a presentation. the week after that, i will have to hand in the draft copy of my thesis and my final year project logbook. the following week, i'll be having my finals which will be on the 7th, 8th and 10th of april. at least this finals i will only have three papers to worry about and i won't have any continuous papers like last sem...

once the finals are over, i'll have about 5 days to get ready for my final year project presentation and my thesis is due on the 30th of april.

so how's that for a tight schedule? i can barely breath... but i'm still trying my best to not let the pressure get over me. this is my final sem and i'm trying my best to get it over with as relaxed as possible.

so, wish me luck and hopefully i will be able to update my blog before everything is done... i guess this period of time may not be the most important of my life... but it will certainly be a defining moment... whatever the outcome, i couldn't have wished for more... =)

and now, i shall return to war... hahaha...

title and comments please...

i wrote this when i was a little bit angry... just a little... let me emphasize on the "little"...

ok... and when you read this, just keep in mind that it is about no one... the characters do not exists... the "i" is definitely not me and the "you" refers to no one in particular...

you see... when i write these poems/articles... i like to take my feelings at that particular moment and magnify it by 10... or maybe 100... so some might find my writings a bit to extreme but i say it gives my writings more emotion... you've got your way, i've got mine...

now, what i need to complete this article/ poem... is a title... i just can't figure out one that is suitable...

and probably some comments from anyone... i dun think this piece is good... just i haven't written in a while... so... comments ok? anything... just leave it here...

I love you, more than anything
I hate you, almost just as much
What am I to do with you?
How do I love and not hate?

Stop messing with me and love me
Stop being a person and be my love
Stop caring about anything but us
Stop being an individual but a partner

Sacrifices has to be made
Sacrifices do not hurt
Sacrifices are voluntary actions
Sacrifices are our bond

I will not cross the barren desert
I will not climb the highest mountain
I will not walk through the fires of hell
I will change myself for you

I will not endure all those torture
Not because I am not willing to
But I know you will not allow it
You will not force me through pain

I have faith in you
I need the faith repaid
I have trust in you
I need the trust repaid

I love you, more than anything
I will continue to love you
Yes that I will do, yes
Love without consequences

Motorola IVEC 2007 : part 2 (v2.0)

hmm... just when i thought i've managed to reduce my to do list, i've gotta start all over again... ok... explanation about the "v2.0" on my title - this is my second try in getting this entry done... i've actually completed it once but my streamyx failed me and i lost the post... the entire post... so forgive me if this post is not as comprehensive... i've lost the mood...

so... where did i stop in part 1? right... the second stage...

the second stage of the the competition, there are 2 parts... first, there'll be a treasure hunt with 5 stations and at each station, we'll be given an iq question. if we solved it, we'll be given an item. these items would eventually help us in completing the second part of the second stage. for the second part, we'll be given an incomplete motorola 2-way radio and with the items which we've obtained during the treasure hunt, we are given one hour to fix the radio and also to make sure that it is water resistant. we can seal the phone however we want to, as long as it is not visible once the radio is assembled. the 3 radios which can last the longest submerged in water without leaking, will then be weighed to see who can complete the task with minimum item. the top two groups will then proceed on to stage three. sounds simple right?

so, after we were briefed, we were all waiting with excitement for the treasure hunt to begin. sadly, some miscommunication by the organizers led to the cancellation of the treasure hunt. so instead of running around to obtain our items, we were given the iq questions in a classroom. i think our group did quite well in this stage as we've managed to solve 4 out of the 5 questions. not bad, huh? i'll try to draw some of the questions and post it later... (if i've got the time which i highly doubt it)... hehehe...

so, with the items in our hands, we started fixing the 2 way radio. in this part of the competition, we kinda attracted a lot of attention from the motorola judges... i was surprised as they were always standing around our group. but when i took a look around, i found out why... you see, in solving this task, our group was pretty animated. we were always moving around, walking, standing, sitting on the table, discussing... you get the picture, right? but the other groups... they actually sat down quietly (i can't hear anyone but us talking actually) and just did the task like it was an exam... well, i brought this up coz i was just curious - how can you work in a group without talking? hmm...

at the end of the hour, all the radios were submerged into a tank simultaneously and the intense wait begun. we've waited for about 45 minutes before all but 3 radios were eliminated. and guess what? we've made it into the top 3! hahaha... we were elated!

with much higher hopes and much more optimism, we held our breath as the 3 radios were weighed. much to our disappointment, we were the heaviest phone among the 3. what made it worse was the fact that we lost out to um by merely 4 grams! so you know how light that is?

with that, um and iium made it into the third stage which somehow reminded me of those quizzes which we usually watch on tv. the only difference is that this one had a really bad host. anyway, iium went on to win the competition and sparked a small controversy which left a bad taste with some participants.

you see, there were complaints by certain participants on how the whole competition were in iium's favour in the first place. and there were also some suggestion on how the quiz seems to require a substantial amount of luck rather than engineering knowledge and um lost because of the confusing rules. well, i wouldn't want to go any further than that.

as far as i'm concerned, we went to iium with no preparation and absolutely no expectations. we've emerged as the second runners-up and 250 bucks richer per person (the prize money for second runners-up is 1 thousand bucks). more importantly, in the spirit of the game, is that we lost to a better team. i honestly believed that. so i've got no complaints. =)

here are some pictures of us at the prize giving ceremony... =)

this was the hall where the prize giving ceremony was held... looks grand huh?

let's give it up for the champions!!! ok... second runners-up...

the first, second and third placed team with the dean of engineering, iium

from the left: siow yien, pui leng, chuu liu and the great one... muahahaha (evil laughter please)...

ps: this is the first time i've won any prize which requires a mock cheque and i'm still keeping the mock cheque...hahaha...

getting old?

recently i've discovered that i can't really do things that i would have breezed through a few years ago... and i'm not even talking about any physical activities here. last weekend, i was trying to catch up on lost time with my final year project, so i basically slept about 3 hours a day and the rest of the day was spent in front of my computer screen... however, by the third day, i was feeling kinda sick and really, really exhausted. i ended up in bed with cold and fever...

the events of the past three days made me think - i used to be able to sleep 3 hours a day for a whole week without feeling any effects... what was so different? am i really getting older? is this really the result of one getting older? i'm only 24 for crying out loud! how can i be old?

whatever the reason is, i've gotta start taking better care of my body... with my final sem into it's last month, i can't risk getting sick and screwing up my final weeks as a student...

on a lighter note, i spent the week during chinese new year in my grandma's house in penang... it's the usual cny mood i guess - noisy, hot and lotsa food... =) but it was good spending time back in my parents' hometown. kinda relaxing i guess...

anyway, i've captured some photos of my favourite "symbol" of the chinese new year - the lion dance! i've always enjoyed watching these ever since i was a kid and i'm still amazed by it. so here you go... it's not the fancy lion dance performance that you find in shopping malls, these are those that goes around the village to perform to anyone who welcomes these "lions"...

final payment...

with this invoice and receipt, i've finally paid up the whole sum required for my four year degree course of mechanical engineering in UNITEN. the total tuition fee alone costs about rm 40k in total.

this post is just a reminder for myself on the amount of money invested to be an engineer... i hope i do not waste it... =)

Motorola IVEC 2007 : part 1

ourlast weekend i joined an engineering competition mainly sponsored by motorola (hence the title) for fun. it's held in the international islamic university (iium) in gombak from fri (12/01/07) to (14/01/07). basically, it's a group event and each university is only allowed to send in 2 teams. luckily for me, students of uniten aren't so keen in joining such competitions so i got the chance to represent my uni.

so, all i know about the competition before i left home for iium is the fact that it has three stages and each stage is an elimination round. but to be honest, the fact that the competition is gonna be held in iium interest me more. i've heard so much about this university that it fascinates me - the culture, the belief, the practice... ermm... i might sound a little bit racist here, but i assure you i am not... i am just curious...

so anyway, once i reached iium, the first thing that struck me is how beautiful the university is... i guess it has got the best location for a uni in malaysia with highlands as it's backdrop throughout the university...

ok... back to the competition, i was grouped with chuu liu (my batch, mech eng), pui leng (my batch, electrical eng) and siow yien (junior, electrical eng). i have to add here that we arrived in iium with totally no expectation whatsoever especially since we totally did not prepare ourselves. but when we heard that whoever advances to the second stage (top 10) will receive 500 bucks, it automatically became our target.

anyway, the first stage of the competition was divided into three parts:

- part one: problem solving. we were presented with a problem and then we were given one hour to solve it and present it to the motorola engineers.

- part two: practical test. this is where every member of the group will have to choose a task between c-programming, manual drawing, workshop and circuit lab work. i choose manual drawing as i was the most qualified in our team i guess.

- part three: a multiple choice quiz where every mistake will cost us a -1 point. this quiz covers everything from engineering questions to general knowledge to iq questions.

so, the day actually started well and after i presented our idea in the first part of stage one, i was quietly confident. but when the day went on and i sat for the practical test, my confidence shrunk. i thought i was good in manual drawing... but let's just say i'm totally wrong! that's not the worst part yet... when i sat for the mcq quiz, my confidence was virtually non-existent... at the end of it all, we were quite exhausted so we headed out of the campus to re-energize ourselves with a huge dose of mcdonald's! hahaha...

then, the next day arrived, the moment we were all waiting for... and guess what? after the first stage, we were in the fifth place! we're through to the second round! now the confidence is back and there's an air of anticipation among us... so we were now eagerly looking forward to the second stage...

and for the second stage of the competition, i'll continue with that in the next post... i know there's a possibility that next post to come after a few weeks, but it's almost 3am now and i've got a fully packed day tomorrow... so... good night!

here i am in iium! this is the main building of iium i think... well, it's the first building as we enter the gate and it looks kinda majestic...

the mosque in iium... i was told that it's the center point of the university and i would expect no less actually... but truth be told, it all looks really grand...

feeling blue...

i've been feeling a little bit on the down side the past couple of days. no idea why and although it's become something of a rarity these days, i still hate these mood swings. i can't control it as much as i can't control the sun giving way to the moon... but talking about it, even writing about it here makes me feel weak...

and i hate that feeling...

welcome 2007

i ushered in the new year with great caution and worry... 2007 could be a huge in both extremes - it might turn out to be the year that changed my life for the better or worse... in three months, i will be graduating and with that i will be faced with a list of decisions accompanied by many consequences... come to think of it, all my life, the choices that i had to make were rather straightforward and simple...

after my primary school, i applied for the best high school at the time and i was offered a place... after spm, i decided to challenge myself with stpm, a choice which i learnt to regret at first but i started to appreciate it more as time goes by... i've learnt a great deal from my 2 years spent in form 6... not particularly enriching my knowledge but more on the "real world" - i know, it's a little bit too cliche...

the choices set in front of me after my stpm were trimmed due to my pretty screwed-up result and also partly due to my stubbornness in wanting no less than to pursue a degree in mechanical engineering or chemical engineering... no more UM, USM, UTM and the likes... i was offered a place in Kolej Universiti Teknologi Tun Hussein Onn to do mech eng actually which i wasn't keen on enrolling - i was advised not to in fact by many ppl... i had to forget about private colleges and overseas education as well due to the financial situation.. therefore, i settled on applying for UNITEN and UTP, both being semi-private therefore affordable...

the choice of enrolling in UNITEN actually was made based on location more than anything else... i would have preferred UTP coz i actually had chemical engineering as my first choice and UNITEN only offered mechanical... but since UNITEN is just 25km away from home and about 5 thousand bucks cheaper per year, the choice is pretty much clear...

so far, i've got not much complaints... none at all actually... but in three months, the first and most obvious decision that i have to make is do i cont my studies or do i plunge head first into the working world? i know myself well enough to make the conclusion that once i start working, i can't sit my ass down to study anymore... but i do not want to blindly give up my pursuit in education that i look back 5 years from now and think to myself "what if?"... no... i do not want to regret any decision that i make now...

so what do i do? i haven't got the faintest idea... not yet anyway...

i'm back!

hey there...

i'm back home after one week in kota kinabalu with shell's gourami business challenge. it was loads of fun! anyway, more about that later...

right now, i'm finally into the last semester of my degree in uniten and it's actually going into it's 4th week now... i hope this last sem of mine will be nothing but smooth...

and finally new year is here... this new year will be kinda different as ly is no longer celebrating it with me... after 6 new year's eve with her, this year is definitely a little bit strange...

hmm... i know this entry is all a one-liner update, but i'm in a rush... i'll be spending new year's eve with my family this year and we'll be going of to port dickson in a couple of hours time... so i've got to start packing now...

i'll be back with more news bout the gourami challenge soon... and for now, i'll just leave you all with a group pic taken during my stay in kk...

industrial training part 1

here's a really belated post about my industrial training and my 3 month stay in penang... i'm not really in the mood to type a long post, therefore i'll let the pics do most of the talking... =)

first and foremost, this is where i work... it used to be agilent technologies alone but they kinda sold their semicon dept to avago technologies and they are currently sharing the same building... the working experience was beneficial i would say... it was valuable not in any technical sense but more in the sense that i was exposed to a real working environment - the "real world" as my supervisor would say...

and this is where i stayed... it cost 500 bucks a month but i shared it with 3 other uniten mates so it's 125 per person... it has 2 rooms, 1 bath, 1 toilet, a comfortable living room and kitchen and it even has a tiny balcony... not too bad and i got quite comfortable living there too... provided some memorable moments...

this here was my room for that 3 months... i slept on the top and as you can see, that's my comp... u didn't think i'd leave my comp at home for three months did you? i can't survive 3 months without my precious... =)

that place really ain't too bad... there's even a river view from my house... hehehe... and from the picture, you can see my ever trusty ride - the classic white proton saga... it's old but reliable (most of the time, anyway)...

hmm... i can't seem to post anymore pictures... i guess there is a limit on the size of each blog... so i'll make this a 2 part blog - second half coming right up!

can't forget (but life goes on...)

the events of nov the 3rd still lingers fresh in my memory. will i ever forget it ever happened? i doubt it... but i pray each night that i will have the courage somewhere in my heart to forgive them... in the meantime, life goes on...

sometime last week, a couple of days after my finals were over (i kinda lost track of time), i received a call from shell... well, good news i guess but i'm not really in the mod to rejoice right now... anyway i'll be flying to kota kinabalu on the 13th of dec to join the shell gourami business challenge... basically they (shell) will be bringing a group of asian undergraduates together to see how well we work together and how well we perform (i dun really know the tasks yet)... if we're good enough, they'll offer us a job... i'm not too optimistic right now but i'll just take it as a break... and if we're gonna be staying at any of the islands in sabah then it could turn out to be a splendid holiday... =)

hmm... my mind is blank... i guess that's it for now...

one more thing - i'm currently on my one month break which will be until the 11th of dec but i'll be rather busy this one month trying to complete my final year project... so i guess there's not much plan for having fun... =(

3rd November 2006

i have said that i will not post again till after my finals. but this is a date that i will remember for the rest of my life. on this day- my life, my family, my belief is changed and i doubt it will ever be the same again.

i would like to say that the change is a positive one. but sadly, there isn't a a worse change that i can think of at the moment. i wish i could pour out my feelings here but i will not. it saddens me to think that this will happen to me and my family.

at the moment, my heart aches as if i have lost a loved one... and i dun think it will ever heal...

another break?

it seems that every time i'm determined to start blogging frequently again, i'll post one entry and then take another long break from blogging... but it's not my fault!
my finals are around the corner... in four days time actually and my exam schedule this sem is simply just killing me... i've got one paper on the 2nd, 2 papers on the 8th and 1 paper on the 9th... i know it's just 4 papers but that 3 back to back papers is a bit too much for me to handle...

so i guess i'll be disappearing for another 2 weeks or so... rotten luck...

football pics...

this was my team during the third-fourth placing match penalties. it was disappointing to lose like this but we've gone beyond all expectations by reaching the semi-finals in the first place... and again, it was fun... =)

need to start somewhere...

at first, i was thinking of blogging about everything that happened in sequence... i mean from the time i stopped blogging till now... since i kinda stopped blogging at the end of my industrial training which was way back in june, that means i've got about 4 months of blogging to catch up and i think it will take me forever to do that. so instead of leaving everything backlogged, i might as well blog about the current happenings and blog about the things that i've missed when i have the time to...

anyway, here it goes...

the past weekend was supposed to be a bloody hectic one for me. i was supposed to have tests on thurs and fri, one programming assignment to hand in on friday, one project presentation on sat which weighs 25% of my total project and a football tournament in seremban on sat as well... packed huh?

well, things started kinda bad for me. i screwed up the paper on thurs - some really silly mistakes and some wrong definitions. then, the exam was postponed as well as the assignment due date (i've just completed the assignment). so, all of a sudden, my friday is free. that gave me some extra time to prepare for my presentation though...

then saturday came... i finished up my presentation slides at about 330am saturday morning and went to bed. i was supposed to print the slides at my dad's office but i was to lazy to go over at that time so i figured i might as well go to bed and wake up earlier to print my slides...

i woke up at 630, went over to my dad's office thinking that everything is going according to plan... i tried to open the gate and then... the key broke! can u believe it? the key broke in the lock! nevermind, i told myself... just stay cool... there must be an extra key at home... but... guess what - there is no extra key!

with that, my dad called one of his colleagues who were kind enough to bring the key over, let me into the office and i printed my slides. in the end, i was still late for the presentation but the lecturers for my session were quite 'selamba' so it was ok.

my presentation went on quite smoothly although i took 5 minutes more than the allocated time... the questions asked by the lecturers weren't to tough so i guess it's not too bad... anyway, after my presentation, it's time to PLAY!

=)

football... my personal drug of life...

i guess i need to start from the beginning about this tournament...

a while back (i forgot when exactly), i registered for this futsal tournament organized by my church in aid of the orang asli building project. i registered for fun actually and also because i haven't played in ages. at first i was thinking that it's gonna be a simple game, nothing serious. but i was shocked on the day of the tournament.

for the game, we just gave our particulars to the organizer and they divided us into our respective teams. this is to give everyone an equal opportunity (in terms of age, i guess). because we do not even know our teammates before that day and also because it's a church tournament, i didn't really have much expectation. but how wrong can i be...

the tournament was truly challenging and fun! there were extremely plenty of talented footballers and some were even state players... we had fun but i was a bit lacking physically as i haven't been playing for so long... anyway, in that tournament, my team won the silver medal! hahaha... my first futsal medal...

as a result of my performance during that tournament (hahaha... time for some self-praise) i was called to practice for the inter-church tournament which is scheduled for 14th october. honestly, i think i did perform pretty well during that futsal tournament, scoring more than a handful of goals... hehehe...

so, i went for the training as scheduled. but, this is the end of the fairy tale... i did not continue scoring freely... i did not play as well as i did during the futsal tournament... reason - we're playing field football... do you know when was the last time i put on my boots to play field football? that was like in 2002!

anyway, i still made it to the final team which is the reason why i rushed to seremban after my presentation last saturday. we made it to the semi in that tournament, losing on penalties in the third-fourth placing match. i guess i played ok in that tournament - the highlight being a sublime back pass... ok... enough self praise...

this whole football thing was good for me i guess. physically, my fitness has improved tremendously. comparing to the four years i've been in uniten, i guess i've never been as fit as this. realistically, i've also learnt that my football skills ain't that good. seriously, i once thought i could play anywhere... but not anymore...

no matter what, i still do enjoy the game and i always will... =)

i just realized something... this blog is getting way too long... i guess i'll stop here and continue on next time... i'll post a couple of pic on the football tournament soon... for now, i've got to prepare for the test tomorrow, the one i was supposed to have last friday...

so, how was my weekend? good or bad? i dunno... all i know for sure is that i enjoyed it... =)

ps: kam came back again... we went out for a drink, played some futsal... had fun... hehehe... i just wanted to mention his name so that he doesn't think that i forgot bout him again... =)

it's been too long...

hi folks... it's been a while since i last wrote anything here... and a hell lot of events have unfolded in that period of time in which i have disappeared...

the routine life of a student has returned but i guess the events of the past 3 or 4 months have changed my life indefinitely. i won't be writing a long post here as i've got a long day tomorrow and i'll need the rest tonight. however, let's just make a list of things which i would like to write about in the next few entries.

1) industrial training experience
2) final year project
3) langkawi trip
4) football
5) last but definitely the most important - ly

i would surely love to be able to post more frequently but with my schedule these days, i cannot guarantee any of that. but i will try to keep this blog alive. it is my personal space after all...

it's the end...

it's officially the end of my training...

=(

or should it be... =)

end of a chapter...

2 hour and 30 minutes more and my industrial training is coming to an end... it means much more than just the end of my training... it also means that i'll be going into my final year of studies...

will i further my studies after that? i don't know.

but if i don't further my studies, this will be my final year of classes. final year as a student. actually, i dun even have one year. i have about 8 months...

i'll try not to think of that now... back to my work... =)

final week

i'm into my final week of my industrial training in penang with agilent tech. more precisely, i've got 5 days left.

the past 3 months have definitely flew by. now that i'll be going back to the life i have been so accustomed with in kl, there is a hint of sadness in my heart. not sad really. it's more of a heavy hearted emotion. i've grown comfortable with life in penang. comfortable in the speed of life, comfortable in what i do everyday.

i think there is more adjustment required than anticipated when i return to kl. back to the hectic life of kl.

last 16 predictions

these are my predictions for those who will make it to the round of sixteen. feel free to place bets on these teams but if you lose any money, dun blame me... =)

actually, i would like to see teams like japan and the usa make it through to the next round as well. but i dun see japan making progress past brazil or australia. and usa definately could not compete with the likes of czech republic and italy. i'll have to wait till the 23rd of june to see how much i'm right (or wrong) with my predictions....

Group A
Germany
Ecuador

Group B
England
Sweden

Group C
Argentina
Holland

Group D
Portugal
Mexico

Group E
Czech Republic
Italy

Group F
Brazil
Australia

Group G
France
South Korea

Group H
Spain
Ukraine

ps: teams in italic i predict to win their respective groups.

lets hear the three lions roar!

one more day to end the 4 year wait. one more day to the greatest cup competition. one more day to the most hyped and anticipated football tournament. one more day to 1 whole month of football. =)

before the world cup kicks off, i just want to state that i'll be backing england all the way! i would've supported malaysia if one day they could make it through. anyway, i know england has their chances magnified by the press and ignorant supporters like me. i know they dun match the silky skills of brazil. but what the heck. football matches are always full of surprises. and you can't deny that this has got to be the most talented english team for some time now. so keeping my fingers crossed, i predict england vs brazil in the final! it could happen, right? by then, england would have to get by argentina, holland, germany or portugal. so i guess if they can beat those teams, they would stand a pretty good chance of making it to the semi or even the final.

ps: i would also like to see brazil, holland and portugal doing well. oh yeah, and definitely japan as well. =)

just for the record

06:06:06 @ 06/06/06

i just wanted to write something at this time and date to keep a record of this moment. some believes it to be the end of the world while some believes it to be the luckiest moment. whichever it is, the day did not start too bright for me and i'm not dead yet, so i guess it's just superstitous beliefs.

anyway, i've been away for some time as my training here at agilent has kept me surprisingly busy. and since i've got no internet connection at my temporary home now, i do not really have access to update my blog. a lot has happened though in the past 2 months but i will find the time to update it. slowly.

back to work.

a new revelation

last weekend was one of the very few weekends that i do not travel home to kl. and since i've got 2 days to burn with nothing particularly important to do, i decided to drive down to spend a couple of nights with my grandma. in making that trip, i ended up visiting my aunt (mum's sis) and my uncle (dad's bro) as well. oh yeah, and i actually bumped into my god-parents as well (haven't seen them in ages)...

well, this might sound normal to most of you but it's quite out of the ordinary for me. perhaps i should mention that i made all this visits on my own. what makes it weirder was the fact that all this bonding stuff was usually left to my sis. i'm always the cool, quiet kid that nobody notices. but i have to say, spending last weekend visiting my relatives was indeed worthwhile. there's a sense of satisfaction which i could not explain.

anyway, right now, i'm spending my working time blogging as my mood sucks. why? thank my supervisor. i dunno if i should discuss the details here. but anyhow, i guess once we start working, we've gotta have ppl skills as well right? gotta learn on ways to deal with ppl - superior or not - gotta just suck it up and get on with life. yup. it's nothing serious really, just felt as if i was wrongly blamed for some mistakes. =)

i want to cont my ramblings but i gtg cont my work... till next time then...

special moment?

01:02:03 04/05/06 (hour:minute:second dd/mm/yy)

these numbers have made it to the front page of the papers, were said to be special, have been circulated through mails and forwarded in sms'. true, they are special in the sense that these sequence will never happen again for the next thousand years. come to think of it, those of us living in this millennia will be going through many more of these 'special moments'. another one will be coming soon in the form of 06:06:06 06/06/06.

anyway, although i do not believe in any astrology or the stars and moon stuff, i do accept that it is not something we come across everyday. so wat were you doing at that very moment? me? i was on the phone with ly... =)

all about work...

here i am in my third week in penang. so, where to start?
well, work started out to be rather boring, and then i started to be busy (which was way cooler than being bored) and now, i'm back to being bored again. and guess wat? i'm blogging from the office.... =)
so, a little bit on agilent. well, agilent is a spin-off of hewlett-packard company with it's headquarters in palo alto. agilent's number one business is on test and measurement instruments. somehow, agilent, avago, hp, lumileds and philips is connected. but i dunno how. i tried finding out and the sequence is something like agilent (test and measurement) is the child of hp, avago (semicon) is the child of agilent and lumiled (leds) was a part of agilent which was sold to philips. something like that.
anyway, seeing the core business of agilent, i didn't really look forward to having my vacation training here. i mean, wat's a mechanical engineer gotta do in a electronics based factory right? i couldn't be more wrong. knowing that i was in the control test division, i figured i had to troubleshoot some instruments or do some reliability test. instead, i was put in the packaging department where the department is in charge of designing boxes! yes... boxes...
i wasn't too thrilled on my first day either. designing boxes? packaging? come on... but as i learned more about the job, it gets more interesting. we actually use a 3d software - cocreate onespace designer which is my field of interest (i really enjoy 3d design and modeling, no idea why), and we dun just design boxes... we do all sorts of mechanical drawings. the software used is similar to proengineer (the one used in uniten) but a little bit more tricky and not as user friendly. it doesn't really matter though, i've always wanted to know wat it would be like to have a job in designing. although wat i had in mind was on a much bigger scale (cars maybe?) boxes and electronic parts isn't such a bad start.
so the first week in front of the pc was a torture. just sitting in front of the monitor from 8 to 5 everyday learning the software is the sole definition of boredom. but there were moments of fun as well when they had an experiment on one of the boxes which was designed. before i say anything further, let me clarify - wat they design isn't just boxes but also the foams and fillers which is supposed to support and protect the instruments in the box. so, back to the experiment. it's called the drop test where the instrument would be packed as for shipping, placed on a hydraulic arm, raised to a certain height and dropped. an accelerometer would be mounted on the instrument beforehand so that readings could be taken.
the experiment is rather simple but there is something about dropping a package of about 20+kgs from 4 feet which excites me... hehehe...
after that, during my second week, i was really busy with loads of drawings to complete, so during the second week, work was rather interesting... but at the start of this week, there's not much to do... and i am required to write the reports for the drop tests which kinda feels like i'm back in uni... plus, my supervisor is asking me to do a project write-up, some sort of presentation which compares the old packaging method and the new packaging method. i roughly get wat he wants, but there's one prob - i dunno anything bout the old or new method. i've been given the deadline at the end of my 12 weeks, so that gives me some time to scratch my head, looking for an answer.
up till today, i've done several mech drawings, 4 drop tests and reports, started on the outline of my project write-up and some odd jobs (checking stock, going to the warehouse, inspection on foams etc). not as bad as i thought it would be. i just hope it stays that way. well, i've gotta get back to work now... till next time, bye...

schlumberger update...

Dear Nicholas,

Thank you for attending the interview sessions with Schlumberger. We did not shortlist you for the internship session, however, we are keeping your file for the Field Engineer position next year. For next year, you just have to attend the final interview session with the Operations Manager.

Regards,
Fauziah

is this good or bad? basically it's a rejection. but at least i dun have to go through all 4 interviews again next year. and at least i know the result of the interview now... =(

first post from penang...

i'm back... but my posts will be far and few... right now, i'm typing my blog in a cyber cafe (i feel kinda old and left out... everyone is playing something i've never even seen or heard about before... damn...) this is something i never thought i would do... blogging from a cyber cafe i mean... anyway, here i am and this is the reason why.... my finals ended last week (30/03/2006)and from this week onwards (03/04/2006), for a duration of 12 weeks, i'll be away on industrial training/ vacation training/ internship. as i have posted previously, i was hoping my industrial training will not be in kl. and guess wat? i got my wish! half of it anyway. at first, i was hoping to get a placement with schlumberger. and after going through 4 interviews, i had high hopes on a positive outcome. i really did. however, the fourth interview came a bit too late (24/03/06) i guess. so till now, i'm still waiting for the result of that interview. this leaves me with the only choice i had - agilent technologies. probably i shouldn't put it to sound so bad especially considering agilent technologies is a pretty good company to get attached to for industrial training. or so i've heard. i'll give my point of view at the end of my 12 weeks here.
anyway, right now, i'm renting a place with 3 other frens. it's a pretty small place with only 2 rooms but it only costs 500 bucks and it's fully furnished. with the rates in penang, i guess we can't ask for more. after a couple of days, the house is alright. not too bad. pics will be up soon.
i guess that's all i have to say about my industrial training for now. i've only been here for 2 days so nothing much has happened. all i can say is that i'm looking forward to the coming 12 weeks - this is my first time away from home for so long.
bout my previous sem, i'm glad it's over. i had a huge, huge problem with one of my lecturer. i'm pretty close to hating him. anyway, i'm glad that class is over and done with. i'm planning to write a complain letter bout him though - he tricked us in the final exam by providing the wrong formula in the formula sheet. if u want us to memorize the formula, dun give us the formula sheet! it's that simple... ok, i admit it... i hate him...
other than that, the other subjects were pretty fine... several competitions kept me busy... oh yeah, two competitions left me disappointed (einic 06 and phillips young challenge 06) but another one (indec 06) gave me a silver medal! =) actually i joined all 3 competitions with the same product and the silver medal is nothing major really. coz indec (invention & innovation design competition)is in it's first year and it is organized by uniten for uniten. so it's kinda like einic but solely focused on uniten's students.
and there is one ongoing competition - robocon 06. the actual date is on the 5th of may so the work is being continued by other members. i am planning to return to kl during the weekends to cont working on the competition. but obviously i can't do that every weekend, so i'll just have to wait and see how everything goes.
i guess this will have to end here. it's getting pretty late and i'm still not used to waking up at 7 for work.

ps: the cyber cafe rate here is really cheap - 1.50 per hour so i think i'll be doing this often if i'm not too lazy. =)

uncertainty

no time to update right now although plenty has happened in the past month. i'll find the time to bare it out soon and i probably won't be updating my blog from home, hopefully... i'll explain it the next time i blog... till then...

ps: i know i said i dun blog for others to read, but for the sake of entertaining me, can someone leave me a comment or two?

entry no 101

i've past the century mark! i've started writing in this blog for fun... but now, looking back, it has inadvertently became my diary... i've never been able to keep a diary all this while so i guess this is the only space in which i allowed the outpouring of my feelings... to reveal my deepest and darkest secrets... *devilish grin*

but truth be told, i've held back so many things writing this blog... i dun think it portrays who i really am... at times, i've written to portray myself as a jerk - emotionless and sarcastic... the only explanation i have is that i feel safer behind this mask... a mask which will never reveal my weaker side, my emotions...

lately, my writings have become shallow... i'm writing without passion... i'm writing just for the sake of keeping this blog alive... probably as a hope that some things in life will always be there - friendship, love, hope...

sadly, when i started this blog, it actually made me feel closer to a couple of my friends... every comment they left on my blog actually meant something to me... and that was my main purpose in writing this blog as well... now, i feel as though my blog is an abandoned structure... lifeless in all it's purpose... i'm not asking for more publicity or more comments... my readers are a select few anyway... i just felt as though the content of my writing lately defeats the purpose of my blog...

this is actually a mirror image of my take on life right now... everything seems dull, meaningless... everyday a lifeless routine that i drag myself through... no fire within me, no passion... everything that i once was interested in seems pointless these days... what is wrong with me?

i wanted someone to talk to... and there is someone at my side always... but i just can't let it out... i just can't talk... so i've learnt to keep myself occupied with studies, projects... something that i can work with logic and equations... shutting out my emotions completely...

ironically, here i am talking about that problem which i can't seem to be able to talk about... is this a fitting entry for my post no 101? this could be my last... no... i'll be back... but for now, i think i'll just fill this space with more shallow entries...

19th january 2001

i should have posted this post on the 19th of jan but due to my extremely busy schedule i couldn't find the time to (i know, it's a lame excuse) ... and now i hope that this will make up for lost times...

it's been 5 years since i started my relationship with ly... through good times and bad, we have survived the test of time for so long now... looking back at our relationship, i do realize we've had more bad times than good recently... and i know we both look back on our first couple of years together more than we look forward to our future... i dunno if that's good or bad... but i have to admit, the first couple of years we were together gave me some of the sweetest memories i've had... =)

happy anniversary...

good times...

met up with some secondary mates last night... had a good laugh and even had the opportunity to celebrate a fren's birthday... we talked and laughed all night reminiscing the good old times... thinking bout it right now, i've known these guys for almost 10 years now... and this is probably the last time we'll meet up as students...

jason and jacky is graduating after this sem... ang is graduating end of the year... i'm graduating middle of next year... by then, most of my frens will be working adults... i wonder wat will change then?

well... no matter wat changes, the past stays the same. and at times like this, i am grateful for the past... no one can replace these frens...

ps: taking a break after facing the comp for the past i-dunno-how-many hours doing my bloody lab report... =(

...

finally, a week's break. it's been almost one month now since my last post... in the past few weeks, i've had tests, quizzes, assignments, one job (industrial training) interview and i took part in one engineering competition. and all of these took up all my time and more...

well, where do i start? how bout the competition? ok... it's the engineering invention 'n' innovations challenge (einic) 2006. this is the second time i took part in this competition. dun blame me for my less than enthusiastic entry about the comp this time, i can still taste the bitterness of defeat in my mouth.

the first time (last year), we won the best booth competition. not bad considering it was our first try. this year we ended up with nothing. i'm not a sore loser. i dun mind losing to someone admittedly better than us. and the winner... well, i dun wanna condemn their ideas and effort... let's now forget about that and move on shall we?

next up, my industrial training. this is much better news. first, i've already confirmed a placement with ae automotion in johor. the only downside is that they only provide rm300 allowance and i've got to find a place to stay on my own. so 300 ain't gonna take me through a month. second, i've been called for an interview with virtual tech in kelana jaya. i haven't had the reply yet but this is much more promising. they are a software company (engineering related - design and analysis), the kind that i'm interested in. and i can stay at home and drive there everyday so money won't be a problem.

about all my tests, quizzes and assignments, well... i'm kinda used to all that these days. i mean... it's been 3 years now. and this sem, i think i can handle the subjects. all except one. and it's due to the lecturer not the subject. that bloody lecturer... he's getting onto my nerves every single class... it's tough to concentrate on the subject when i've got so much ill-feeling towards the lecturer. i dunno how to explain it here but he's just damn bloody irritating.

let me give you one example. for his second quiz, i got a 2/10 coz i was totally unprepared. he ended up talking about my score for 30 minutes the next class. not only that, he helped me spread the news to the other sections that he's teaching. give me a break will you? and before the midterm tests, he asked if we have any questions to ask. but when we asked him questions, he replied with sarcastic answers (none of which answered our questions)! if you do not want to answer us, why bother to ask us in the first place?

i think that's enough complains for one entry. hopefully my next post will sound more optimistic and cheerful... it's gonna be the chinese new year! bye bye lil chicken... make way for the puppy... hehehe....

good news, weird news

really busy to elaborate so i'll go straight to the point...

good news: my nose is not fractured and it still looks normal

weird news: my nose is crooked (the bone is somehow bent in a weird way, although it's not noticeable from the outside...)

and i dun feel any discomfort at all... the wonders of the human body...

off to a bad start...

i dun know if it's bad luck or it's just an omen to stop me from playing futsal. the first game on the first day of the year and i fractured (maybe) my bloody nose...

i went to a clinic and the doctor says it's most probably fractured... he can't be sure without an x-ray though... so i'll go get one soon and i'll keep my fingers crossed...

why is it always me? i'm seriously thinking maybe i should just stop playing futsal... first my ankle and now my nose? damn...

merry xmas and a happy new year

good bye 2005... thank you for all the memories that you've given me... for all the good times and bad times, i will always remember you...

and...

hi 2006... i hope we'll get acquainted well enough... i look forward to a wonderful relationship with you... =)

F@&*ing busy...

the title says it all... damn...

birthday in genting

although i'm blogging bout it pretty late, but the memory is still as fresh as though it was just yest... on the 3rd of dec, ly and i went to genting to catch the michael bolton concert. actually, she bought the tickets and booked the room for the night as a surprise birthday gift for me... =) thank you!

i was just as excited as she was coz this is the first time we'll be spending the night together, just the both of us... furthermore, i've never been to any concert before and michael bolton is a pretty good concert for my first experience...

anyway, we left kl at about 3pm and we reached the genting first world hotel at about 5. once checked in, i saw a spectacular view where we could actually see the whole amusement park from our room...

this is the only clear pic that i could manage where the view is not covered in fog... genting is still by far the best amusement park in malaysia...

after a quick dinner that night, we made it to the arena of stars and waited in anticipation. michael bolton did not disappoint with his 2 hour performance and sang most of my favorites like go the distance, when a man loves a woman, how am i suppose to live without you and etc... till today i'm still in the concert mood - my mp3 player is still filled with his songs...

anyway, if you notice the pic above, you'll see two shots of a lady... man... you've gotta see her to know wat i mean... the way she danced, the way she moved... just so damn sexy! =)

during the second half of the concert, they actually allowed us to approach the stage and it is pretty obvious if you look at the crowd - the gals mainly couldn't take their eyes off michael bolton and the guys? they were surrounding this dancer to take a photo of her... and obviously, i'm guilty of that too... =)

well, enough of the sexy lady... =) the pic above is taken in our room (left) and also in the cable car ride on the way down from genting (right)...

that night, after the concert, we went out for a drink and spent the night talking... it's been a while since we really talked, you know? i've always been so busy with my uni and time is always so limited...

time actually flew by that night and before we know it, it's morning and time to leave... =(

but it's not all gloomy! we actually had 2 coupons for a buffet lunch and we decided to use them before we return home... and you should see the look on her face when we saw all the food waiting for us! hahaha... like a kid opening her present on christmas morning (she's gonna kill me for this)... =)

we filled our appetite till we couldn't eat a bite more and this time, it's really time to leave... although there was a pang of sadness but i was still happy as this is one of the best birthday presents i've ever received... =)

bye bye genting... till next time... =)

personalized night lamp

remember i mentioned working on some small projects during the holidays? well this is one of my mini project which i managed to complete... nothing really special, just a simple home made night lamp... =)

these are the tools and materials used for my own personalized night lamp...

a simple square lashing to hold the frame together... no nails!

after about a week, this is the finished product. didn't turn out as nice as i thought it would be, but what the heck... it's my own work... btw, this project cost me a mere + rm 30 and if i'm not mistaken, a lamp like this (aesthetics value notwithstanding) costs about rm 100 in ikea... so there you have it... =)

back to school

blogging from my uni, today's just my second day back in uni and i'm already feeling tired. i know i say this everytime we start a new semester but the fact is that it is getting worse with each passing semester - i've lost the zest to continue studying.
somehow, studying here doesn't seem as interesting as it used to be during my first semester. maybe because that's all i've been doing for the past 3 years - studying. although the subjects get tougher with each passing year, the surrounding gets more cramped as well.
someone told me it's because of the lack of recognition here. it doesn't matter if u score an A or a D, no one gives a damn. personally, i dun care bout that although i have to admit sometimes it disappoints me. all this while i use this speech instead, "you should be studying for yourself, your future. getting an A should give you all the satisfaction any reward will give... blablabla...", ok... i admit it sounds crappy but that's the best i can come up with.
my main prob - i still dun feel at home here. especially when i'm alone. ah... such a simple word but yet so, so very cold. alone. after 3 years in this uni, sometimes i still find myself sitting alone, waiting for time to flash by but as it always is, the seconds ticked by ever so slowly. it's just frustrating.
i dun think of the past anymore. not as much as i used to anyway. but not thinking of the past doesn't make the present any better as well... damn...
anyway, i guess i'll stop here...i just needed to let some steam out. i'm not complaining bout my life and i definitely do appreciate my life as it is. and i'm sure i'll start enjoying my studies again... i just dunno when...

ps: i expected to be bombarded for my thoughts on the previous blog but i guess i was wrong...

nude lady doing ear-squats

i'm sure everyone knows bout this incident by now. it has been widely spread and criticized since the day the video was captured. my personal opinion? it has been blown out of proportion and i think all opinions heard on the media is ill-judged. in simpler language - never listen to just one side of the story. i mean, this incident was reported by an mp and not even by the lady involved.
i have seen the video and certain things have caught my attention. it has been said that this lady is abused and her rights were violated. so before i watched the clip, i assumed the lady would look frightened, ashamed, lost and etc. but i was surprised to see that she was calm and composed.
i'm not writing this blog to judge anyone. i'm not here to say that what the police did was wrong/right. all i'm saying is that there is always two sides to a story. and we haven't even heard one side of it yet. who is that lady? what crimes have she committed? no one knows. as for the police, i'm sure they could come up with a pretty good explanation of the incident although i'm not sure if it will be accepted by the public.
this reminds me of the days when i was in vi. in the scout group that i was involved in, there is this orientation that all members had to go through at the end of form 3 - from boy scouts to seniors. for us, that orientation is a necessity. a tradition that must be upheld. although some seniors have misused their authority and turned the orientation into their own sick means to torture others, this orientation is nevertheless an important essence in the tradition of our scout troop. i can understand that because i was part of the troop. but good luck explaining it to others. outsiders would never understand the need for such a tradition.
i'm getting a little bit off-tracked here. anyway, all i wanna say is that the manner in which the police handle criminals should be left to the police to decide. that's why we shouldn't turn to crime right? as long as you don't do anything wrong, you wouldn't be in custody and your rights wouldn't be violated. you expect to be a criminal and still have your rights defended/ protected? no. the police should have the upper hand in this.

ps: however, i have to add that getting caught like that - allowing someone the opportunity to record the whole incident on video is just plain stupid. at least have the brains to do it somewhere no eyes can see.

emily rose

i watched emily rose the other day with ly and i think it's a show worth mentioning. especially now that it's 3 am... hehehe... those who have watched it should know wat i mean...
i dun find the show really scary like those old freddy kruger (21st elm street and etc) horror films but the images in the movie is somehow really disturbing. it scared ly enough all right... =)
comparing it with all the horror flicks shown lately, this definitely stands out. the acting is pretty outstanding and the story does make you wonder. are you a true believer and strong to your faith? and if you do not believe in gods, well, watch the movie and decide...
to those who have watched it - "one two three four five SIX!"
muahahahaha...

good and bad...

plenty has happened since i last posted.
sat (19/11) - man utd says goodbye to one of the best players to have ever played for the club. roy keane, the epitome of everything man utd stands for. he is the old school midfielder which is a rare species these days. hard tackling, no-nonsense is his game. at his prime, he was a box-to-box player who feared no one and even at his age now, he does not shirk from a tackle. a true leader and a fighter. he will be missed. and let us remember him for all that he has done for the club.
sun (20/11) - on a positive note, i went to watch the A1 GP in the afternoon and it was a hell lot of fun! it is no match for F1 for sure but the race is more exciting in A1 and with the right kinda publicity, it will surely be one of the best race series to come. i mention publicity because sadly, the turnout was dismal. i dun think the grandstand was even filled to 30% of its capacity.
as for alex yoong's performance, he came in 5th and that's not a bad try considering team malaysia beat team usa, japan and great britain - teams from countries that are technologically more advanced compared to malaysia. but you know wat's the best part of it all? the support! oh yeah, we got behind alex and we were loud and clear about it! when he came into the pits after the race, the cheers of “malaysia boleh!” rang out as though he has just won the race... and the feeling of unity among fellow malaysians was overwhelming... =)
on the other hand, after returning home from sepang, i went for a game of futsal with my friends. after a really long break from the game, this would be only my 2nd game after last weekend. and after playing for bout 30 minutes, i had a collision and as i fell on my sprained ankle, i heard 3 loud "cracks". i dunno how to explain that noise but it was definitely followed by pain! damn, it's been a while since i felt that amount of pain. i retired from the game and i had difficulty walking after that.
mon(21/11) - when i woke up, there was a sudden rush of pain in my leg which almost brought tears. so i decided to pay a visit to the chinese doctor. after 2 hours of waiting, it was finally my turn but the moment he touched my ankle, i had no idea why i even bothered waiting. it hurts like hell! according to him, my ankle was out of position. dislocated i guess. and after massaging for bout 20 minutes and assuring me that the pain was all over, he pulled a stunt which i will not forget for some time. i dunno wat he did but he twisted and pulled my ankle to get it back into position. i thought i was gonna pass out. damn. although at the moment, my ankle actually does feel much better, i still dun feel thankful yet. maybe i'll thank him later when i can forget the pain.
and things just go from bad to worse. when i checked my e-mail later that night, i realized that the philips young inventor's challenge result was out. yup. you guessed it. i wasn't in. but wat pissed me out was the fact that out of the 15 semi-finalists, 12 came from the same uni. i dun wanna mention names here but something doesn't feel right. i dunno. after so many tries in all the engineering comp, all this failure is starting to make me feel kinda small. am i no good at all? damn once more.

ps: i actually got my result for last semester during the past couple of days too but i forgot when. it's better than i expected but recent events have dampened my mood to celebrate.

A1... here i come! =P

got myself a couple of the A1 GP grandstand tickets today from alex yoong through uniten... kinda excited although it is a lower league race compared to F1. but wat the heck, malaysia's in it! so, alex, do the nation proud.

ps: i'm gonna bring the jalur gemilang along to sepang. yeah! malaysia boleh! =)

platonic relationship - an impossible task?

this issue has always been talked about, studies and psychological review has been done and it even appeared in newspaper columns several times over the past year. the million dollar ques - can't a guy and a gal have a normal friendship without getting emotionally involved?

why is it that whenever a guy and gal develops a close friendship, rumors must spread about their "relationship"? can't they just be frens?

yeah, i know bout the lust and sexual desire argument. but come on. dun tell me everytime a guy gets close to a gal, it will send his hormones raging?

anyway, i think that it is possible for a guy and a gal to remain frens, close frens without getting emotionally/ sexually involved. i really do believe that.

...

went out with my mum yest. went to ikea and to mid valley after that. actually went outlooking for furniture to refurbish my room but couldn't find any that really suited my room/ needs so just ended up strolling around. as i settled down for lunch with my mum, i realized 2 things.

1 - ppl these days dun seem to be working. it was a monday evening (bout 3 or 4) and mid valley was basically crowded with adults/ teenagers/ kids. is there a money printing plant somewhere that i dun know about?

2 - this is more emotional. i saw a few groups of teenage friends hanging out, having a good laugh and i realized it's been a while since i did that with my frens. come to think of it, there's not many frens which i could just call up for a movie or a drink when i want to. most of the 'frens' i know these days are 'study based'. in other words, we meet in class and that's where our friendship starts and ends. maybe it's me being antisocial. but still, i really miss those times when i went out with my frens for movies, drinks, a game of pool, the rare bowling session and talk bout everything under the sky (mostly crap, but still fun)...

at times, i know we've gotta move on and let the past remain in the past. but sometimes i can't help wondering - where has it all gone wrong? since when fun was replaced by boredom. since when i turned from a carefree teenager into a young adult with responsibilities?

these days, i talk more through my comp and sms. even phone conversation has been slashed down, not to mention face to face conversation. i tell you, technology and expectation is killing social life. slowly but surely.

i miss the old days. maybe it's time to do something bout it. i'll start by sending a couple of mails to some of my closest frens whom i haven't meet in a long time.

ps: i've been in a crappy mood the whole day. no idea why.

back again!

it feels like i've been away for months! i've been wanting to blog but i just couldn't find the time/opportunity till now. anyway, a quick update - another semester has come and gone. my finals actually ended on the 26th last month. after the finals, i had a phillips competition proposal to finish up. the results should be out in about two weeks so i won't say much bout it for now.
that was promptly followed by a family vacation to penang (30/10-3/11). that holiday was relaxing and although i've been to penang almost every year, i'd say that was probably the best vacation i've had with my family there. i'll have some pics posted soon.
once i was back in kl, i started working on some small projects to fill my time and that was when my comp decided to call in sick. damn. life without my pc does prove to be torrid. i just got my pc back yest and now life is back to the way it's supposed to be (ok, i'm exaggerating - sue me). so, that kinda covers all that happened in the past 2 weeks. for the details on my "mini" project, i'll post it another day. hopefully it'll be completed enough fro me to post some pics too... just hope i dun get to lazy to type.
right now, i just wanna say something (it's rather outdated but i dun care!) - chelsea, that's how football is played! muahahaha... dun feel so special anymore mourinho? you've got your billions but u can't beat a team consisting of mainly teenagers. and this is a man utd which is considered by far the weakest in comparison to the past teams which ruled the EPL. i've gotta admit that feels so good. although man utd did not display any scintillating form, they did just enough to beat chelsea. a team which many claimed to be invincible in the EPL. however, i've still got my foot on the ground. although man utd did beat chelsea, i'll be the first to admit, chelsea still has the better team. but i dun think that chelsea will run away with the title this season. and i've got my fingers crossed that come may, it won't be chelsea sitting at the top of the table. =)

that's all for now. now that i'm back and since it's my holidays, i hope i'll start blogging more consistently. for these last 2 weeks of my holidays at least.

my gf and me

i love you

good and bad

i probably shouldn't even be blogging at a time like this. i've still got 2 papers coming up (on mon and wed). however, i just wanna spend some time away from my books.

anyway, i watched the match between man utd and tottenham just now and i guess the result (1-1) was justified. man utd played like they didn't want to win that match and now, they just pushed chelsea further up the league table. but there was one particular moment which made me think - things might change for man utd. near the end of the match, with bout 15 minutes to go, ferguson made a switch which reminded me of the old man utd. he took out bardsley (right back) and played rossi (striker) so effectively, for 15 minutes, man utd played with an attacking formation of 3-4-3!

the way the season started, man utd have been playing a little bit too defensive (the ill famed 4-5-1). especially in games which they could have and should have won by a huge margin. this is not the man utd i started supporting in 96/97. the man utd i knew cared very little bout their defensive record. coz they knew if they let in 2 goals, they would score 3. if they concede 3, they'll go on and score 4. u get the idea. there was an air of confidence around man utd.

but not this season. although they've got arguably one of the best strikeforce in the epl with ruud, rooney and ronaldo (okay, he's not really a striker but his skills are amazing), they seem to hesitate too much in front of goal. wat's wrong with them? i dunno (if i knew, i wouldn't be sitting here). but wat ferguson did today might spark a change in man utd's approach to games this season - i just hope it's not a one time tactic.

ok. back to my books.

going for battle

this is gonna be my last post for the next 2 weeks (gonna have my finals). i have no idea why but this semester, i seem to be slightly under more pressure than the previous semesters... just want to get the papers over with and seriously, a part of me doesn't care anymore about my grades. if i score, great. if i dun - sue me. i really dun care.

ps: this is the pressure talking.

freakin busy

i know it's been a while since my last post but what the heck, i've just been so damn bloody busy! i can't emphasize enough on how busy i've been... my finals is starting in 10 days, and i've got tests every week for the past 4 weeks in a row and still i've got a test next tues... man, i'm flat tired.

to add to all the tests and finals looming close, i've got a mini project to handle as well... and it involves solving a 22x22 matrix! what the @#$%... the mini project itself requires us to use a new software which we've gotta learn (easy as it is, it's still time consuming)... and now we gotta learn another software just to solve that bloody matrix...

not to mention i'm not prepared for the finals at all... hell, i'm screwed!